What an Ass!

I love my DH, my hubby, my darling husband, my man. His name is Doug, and that is what I will call him here from now on. He is kind, patient, and wickedly funny. He is a wonderful dad and a refreshingly non-chauvinistic member of our household. He's been my best friend and loverboy for twenty one years and counting. AND...he can be a real ass sometimes.

Remember how I set up my blog while he was out for the evening? I did that for a reason. Doug is a software engineer. He has navigated his way around computers with ease and insight since the days when the high school machine was still spitting out punch cards. He's the guru, the go-to guy, the one you scream for when something isn't going right. Unless it's me. I'm the english major, the artist, the poet, the reader, the knitter. I am a computer-feeb, bar none. And I happen to be his wife, so when I need help, I get nothin' but scorn and derision. Derision and scorn, and a great deal of the rolling of the eyes.

One day, several years ago, Doug had installed a new computer downstairs without telling me. When I went to retrieve my email, I balked. New box. Scary. How do I turn it on? I called him at work. One of his co-workers happened to be walking past Doug's open office door and heard him yelling into the phone, "Push the button! Push it IN! IN! IN!" The collegue remarked to Doug that he could only have been talking to his wife.

So, last night my man returned from his evening out, opened the email I had sent him with the link to my brand new blog (surprise!), and uttered some derogatory remark about a technicality that I had overlooked.

I plan to address him as "ass" for the next three days.